Hiding the Habit
Do you ever feel like Hester in “The Scarlet Letter”? But you wouldn’t have a red letter A sewn to your clothing-it would be a red S for “smoker.”
Since September 2004, when I began working at the Trust as a health writer, I’ve gone to great lengths to keep my smoking secret from a lot of people here-especially those who work in the health and wellness areas.
I was particularly concerned about hiding my habit from the woman who heads our health care quality and safety program. I enjoy working with her and admire her a great deal. Sue’s smart and athletic, and believes we each have a responsibility to take the steps needed to be healthy. No, no way did I want her to know I smoked.
About 11:30 one day, she called and asked if I’d like to go out for lunch and talk about a project we were in the thick of. I told her that would be great, then she said, “Oh, I rode my bike in today. You don’t mind driving, do you?”
I blurted, “I can drive,” hung up the phone and went into full panic mode. I have a typical smoker’s car: overflowing ash tray, ashes everywhere, orange grime clinging to the windows and ceiling-and that overpowering cigarette aroma.
As I paced back and forth in the office, holding my head and saying, “Oh no! What am I going to do?” over and over again, my youthful pal and coworker, Ben, volunteered that I could take his car.
Now Ben is a fabulous fellow. (I’ve more than just hinted to Ben about the availability of one of my daughters.) But Ben is…well..unique. He’s funny and creative. And he has a giant, colorful watermelon slice on the side of his otherwise unremarkable car. A big, weird watermelon slice. So my choice for driving with Sue to lunch was: the Smoker-mobile or the Melon-mobile.
I don’t recall what I told Sue about why I couldn’t drive my car, but we went to lunch in Ben’s Melon-mobile. I swear, every group of teens we passed waved and hooted at the car.
Before I have my last cigarette, I’m going to take the Smoker-mobile to the carwash and ask them to do an especially good job on the interior. Then I’m going to take the ashtray out–and tuck it away in the garage somewhere. I’ll also remove all ashtrays and lighters from the house.
