The lads in this 1906 photo take me back to my earliest cigarette smoking experiences. (Only the experience, friends, not the date.)

Candy Cigarettes

Like many kids in the olden days, my first cigarette was candy. Do you remember candy cigarettes? The ones I had were white with an orange end and tasted like chalk mixed with sugar. I would hold one between my middle and index fingers, dramatically bring it to my lips, tip my head up a little and take a deep “drag” with my eyes half shut. Then I’d tilt my raised chin coquettishly, pout my lips…and blow…and blow…and blow…and blow…

Candy cigarettes are still available. So is information about collusion between cigarette companies and candy manufacturers that produced candy cigarettes. The tobacco companies allowed the candy makers to produce packaging that looked very much like major cigarette brands. Why would they do this? Well, the cigarette makers believed that this was good advertising for their products and would promote smoking to children who could become purchasers of their products in the future.

First Cigarette

When I was about 13, a friend came over with a half-crushed cigarette pack and suggested we have one. Well, my parents weren’t home and it seemed incredibly daring (and scary–but I wasn’t admitting that), so we went into the garage and lit one. I vaguely remember taking the tiniest bit of smoke into my mouth and blowing it out fast.

Then my friend said, “You’re not really smoking–you’re not inhaling.”

O.K. I knew about inhaling because my parents smoked. So I took a small drag of the cigarette and inhaled deeply, which immediately sent me into violent spasms of coughing. My eyes watered, I felt like I was going to faint and my stomach was starting to churn.

We stubbed out the cigarette and destroyed all evidence of our adventure. I felt lousy and I was absolutely terrified my parents would find out.

Puff-Puff

By the time I took up smoking again, I was 16 and mildly-to-moderately rebellious. I thought cigarettes made me look daring and cool.

I began by smoking a cigarette on the way to school. By the time I reached the classroom door, I’d be reeling and nauseous. I continued this, day after day, until my body adjusted to the cigarettes and they no longer made me feel ill. Then I became a regular smoker.

Eventually, my parents found me out. I remember sitting at the table after dinner with my family. Mother handed me an ash tray and said, “Susan, why don’t you have a cigarette right here in front of us.” I was horribly uncomfortable and embarrassed, which was Mother’s intent.

After a battle of wills when my parents demanded that I quit, they caved in and accepted my smoking. That’s when Dad began calling me Puff-Puff, which, of course, I detested. (This is also the time period when, as I was rushing out the door to get to school on time, dad would stop me, yardstick in hand, and demand that he measure the distance between the floor and the hem of my short skirt. Dad, a real morning person, thought this was just hysterical.)

Truthfully, I can’t imagine quitting will be as unpleasant physically as starting the habit was for me.

Today, I accompanied my daughter, Elizabeth, when she had her 20-week ultrasound imaging for her baby, who is due October 24. Aidan Andrew looked perfect and the first-time mom was vastly relieved to see the healthy babe and to know his gender. It is absolutely amazing what can be seen with a modern, top-notch ultrasound machine.

I think it’s well past time to end the family smoking habit. Both of my parents smoked. I know my mother smoked in the labor room when my brother was born–a common practice at the time. My grandparents in southern Indiana smoked. And my great grandmother, Sally Wilkerson, smoked a corncob pipe.

Smoking and Children

There are plenty of reasons not to smoke around children; following are just a few:

• 12-year-olds whose parents smoke are twice as likely to take up the habit.
• Preschoolers with two smoking parents are 85 percent more likely to have ear infections. If their mothers smoke more than 10 cigarettes a day, they were 68 percent more likely to have ear infections.
• It’s estimated that second-hand smoke causes between 150,000 and 300,000 upper respiratory infections each year in children under 18 months of age.
• Children with asthma are twice as likely to have symptoms year-round if a parent smokes. (13 percent of children with asthma have a parent who still smokes.)

You know, I’m horrified just reading this information. YES! I AM GOING TO QUIT SMOKING–FOR AIDEN AND MY OTHER GRANDBABIES, FOR MY HUSBAND AND KIDS AND FOR MYSELF.

Last week, someone asked me what I mean by “focus” and why I believe it’s so important in my quitting effort. I gave her a brief answer, but over the weekend I had a lot of opportunity to witness focus in action and I think I can explain it better now.

If you’re like me, you light many cigarettes without thinking–particularly when you’re distracted. The distraction can be something good like Jeff saying we can afford to go to Europe this fall or something bad like Jeff saying we’ll have to be very disciplined with our money on the trip.

I find it takes focus–not only to think about lighting a cigarette–but to not light it, forcing yourself with self-imposed edicts such as:

• You can have one in 45 minutes. (Typically, I’ll lose track and go well over 45 minutes.)
• You may have one after the next meal because you know you’ll really want one then.
• You can have one after you: run an errand, call your sister, fold a load of clothes, check something on the Internet, etc.
• Do you really want this cigarette or are you thinking about lighting it out of habit? Why don’t you wait a while.
• If you smoke that blasted cigarette your lungs will cave in, your skin will shrivel up, your husband will leave you, you’ll lose your job and house–and you’ll end up a bag lady living on the street.

Persuading yourself not to light up is part of the focus. Being aware of every cigarette is the other part.

Hurray! A trip to Europe! Won’t it be nice to be nicotine-fit-free on the long flight. Won’t it be hard not to smoke at the sidewalk cafes!

Information on what happens to your body after you quit smoking is widely available. But every time I see it, I’m so encouraged that my motivation to quit grows.

In fact, your body begins to heal when you stub out that last cigarette. Here’s what else happens from the time you last smoked:

20 minutes

Your blood pressure and pulse rate drop to normal levels. The temperature of your hands and feet also returns to normal.

8 hours

The levels of nicotine and carbon monoxide in your blood are half of what they were when you last smoked. Take a deep breath, because your oxygen levels also are back to normal.

24 hours

Say goodbye to the carbon monoxide in your system. All that mucus and other crud in your lungs is beginning to clear out.

48 hours

After two to three days, that nicotine you’ve lived with for so long is gone, gone, gone. Everything is beginning to smell and taste better. And you’ll just tingle all over because your nerve endings are adjusting to the absence of nicotine.

72 hours

It’s getting easier to breath. Your bronchial tubes are beginning to expand. And you have more energy!

2 to 12 weeks

Your blood is circulating–as it’s supposed to–and it’s easier to exercise.

3 to 9 months

All that hacking and wheezing drops off as your lung function is boosted.

1 year

Celebrate your victory over tobacco and the fact that your risk of a heart attack is half of that of smokers.

5 years

Your risk of stroke is the same as a nonsmoker and your risk of dying from lung cancer is half that of smokers.

10 years

Why, your car is beginning to smell normal again. The chance that you could get cancer of the esophagus, mouth, throat, bladder, kidney and pancreas also decreases.

15 years

You have no more risk of a heart attack than a person who has never smoked.

Blast it! I’m going to smoke this cigarette and I’m going to enjoy it! I’ll even tear the filter off! I’ll smoke three in a row! I’ll stub them out on the ground–and leave them there! I’ll walk back in the Trust building and not wash the cigarette smell from my hands or chew gum! I’ll go talk to the rabid anti-smokers and breathe rancid cigarette fumes in their faces! When I go home (chain-smoking all the way), I’ll eat whipped cream by the spoon full and smoke in the house.

I thought these things as I tromped outside to have a cigarette earlier today, scowling and muttering to myself. I’m in a foul mood. It’s a gorgeous day and I really want to be in my garden. I can add this to other evidence that confirms: Emotional triggers are going to be incredibly tough for me to withstand.

I have a few ideas about things I can do when I’m grouchy, tired or stressed out.

• Deep breathing exercises are helpful.
• Exercise is supposed to be an extremely good mood elevator, boosting endorphins, adrenaline, seratonin and dopamine–our bodies’ feel-good chemicals.
• Reading a book or watching a movie can effectively distract me if I’m in a bad mood.
• A long soak in the tub is a too rare pleasure.
• Playing my favorites CDs with the stereo cranked way up and belting it out with the music is a fun way to get happy fast. (Yes, my children, even as teens, complained about my loud music.)

I’m going to need some help here. Do you have additional distractions or activities that I can add to the list?

After talking with Andee, my smoking cessation advisor, and looking at a chart that provides the pros and cons of different cessation aids, I’ve decided to go with the nicotine lozenges.

Now, lozenges were not what I thought I’d be using, but after getting the kind of advice from Andee that doesn’t appear in most of the literature describing cessation aids, I do believe lozenges are the best option for me. I’ll share that information with you so you’ll have the whole lowdown.

Nicotine Patch

I thought this would be my first choice, but I eliminated it from the running for two reasons.

• Because I’ve cut back to about 11 cigarettes a day, the patch would deliver more nicotine, all day long, than I’m now getting by smoking.
• Remember my coworker who ended up with a rash from the patch? Well, I get miserable hives–the kind that make me wish I had talons–just by looking at an irritant or allergen. Thus, I’d rather avoid the patch.

Nicotine Gum

Frankly, I’ve heard this stuff tastes lousy. Andee told me some people did describe the old version as “like chewing on a small piece of naugahyde,” but the manufacturer has reformulated the gum. So, if you choose nicotine gum, be sure to ask for the newer, better tasting, reformulated version.

Zyban/Wellbutrin/Bupropion (bupropion is the active ingredient in each of these)

An antidepressant in pill form, Zyban, enables you to reduce cravings and withdrawal symptoms–without using a nicotine substitute.

I’m already taking Wellbutrin for depression, so I’ll add lozenges to the medication.

Nasal or Oral Inhaler

I have allergies and, rarely, asthma, so no nicotine inhalers for me.

Your physician can counsel you on these options as well. You’ll need a prescription from him or her if you decide to use Zyban or an inhaler.

Remember, the Trust will pay for a three-month supply of these cessation aids. And a number of studies show your chances of quitting can be doubled if you use an aid. What do you have to lose besides a life-threatening tobacco habit?